I took the bus to work every day. I didn’t drive nor could I afford insurance or a car. Every day I would wait for my bus for about 10-15 minutes. I was sort of early as the bus was really unpredictable and in the suburban area that I lived the bus came every 45 minutes. So missing the bus was not an option.
One day as I sat and listened to music a guy sat beside me. I noticed he was cute immediately. He had a good sense of style and very clean shaven. He turns around and smiles at me. I smile back.
He says something but I can’t catch what it was, due to the music blasting from my earphones.
I take them off and say, “pardon me?”
He smiles again and replies with, “your very pretty”.
“oh thank you” I reply.
He asked me where I was going, in which I told him I was on my way to work. I saw my bus coming and so did he.
He asked if he could text me and maybe grab some lunch sometime. I told him sure, gave him my number and carried on with my day.
The next day he asked if we could have lunch somewhere near my work. So we went to Starbucks and had coffee and a sandwich.
He would text me every night ever since the lunch date and he saw me every weekday, this lasted for about 2 months. By then we started going on dates on the weekends. He never once asked me to go back to his place. He always came to mine.
That didn’t alarm me of anything. Which I feel it should have.
He was very organized. Like he had OCD. If I forgot something in his car he would see it immediately and tell me “hey take your hair tie back” or whatever it was.
Again, I didn’t think anything of it.
One day I get in his car so we can go to a festival. I finally persuaded him to go to. I see there is a child’s car seat in the back and immediately ask (at this time I didn’t have a child of my own yet). He tells me he has a 1-year-old baby. I asked him why he never mentioned this before.
He said it was because he thought it would be a problem for me and I wouldn’t date him because of it. All I asked was where was the mother?
He said the mother ran away after the baby was born and he was a single father. She had a big drug addiction and couldn’t deal with all the responsibilities it took to be a mother. God was I so naive. I remember saying how sorry I felt for him.
We started sleeping together around this time. He showed me pictures of his baby and told me that once we got more serious he would let me see her.
I started to daydream about meeting her and helping him. He was a damaged hottie who had such a huge heart.
One night I was half asleep when I get a phone call from him. I pick up and a girl is on the line.
Girl: Who is this?
Me: Ashley, Who is this?
Girl: None of your business.
Me: ok….. [in shock]
Girl: Do you know me and Jayden have a baby together?
Me: Yes he told me. You are the…
-She Hangs Up-
This is how you know I’m young and dumb. I STILL didn’t put two and two together.
He comes over that night as I’m confused and tells me how she randomly showed up asking for money for drug addiction and found out he’s seeing someone, which got her all crazy. He apologized for everything and kissed me on the forehead.
He reassured me she’s out of the picture and it would never happen again.
I told him I wanted to see his place. Which he immediately shut down. But I guess he knew that if he wasn’t going to do so, I would start getting suspicious.
He said in 2 weeks I can spend the night at his place.
So 2 weeks passed and it was time. I was excited to come over. So when I did. Things started adding up. He didn’t have OCD because the house was a mess. I noticed a lot of women’s belongings scattered around the house and so I asked. He said his mom sometimes stayed over to help with the baby.
He told me to get changed into his clothes so I would be more comfortable. Since I decided to dress in the most uncomfortable outfit ever. I went to the drawer looked for something I’de like to wear. As rummaged through his clothes I felt something hard between two shirts. Curious to what it was I grabbed it and flung the shirts on the floor. It was a picture frame with a family photo of his so-called “drug addict runaway baby mama”, their baby and him.
I ran straight to him and threw the picture at him and headed for the door. He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him.
“Ashley I can explain” he pleads.
I didn’t want to hear it. Why was I so stupid? The signs were all there. It was so obvious. But I chose not to see them.
He continues to beg, saying how he left his wife and child for me, for us.
For the first time since we been together, he said, “I love you”.
This is all I could say, “I could never love someone who would cheat and throw their wife and child on the street”
I yanked my hand away from his grip and stormed out.
We never talked since.
So in a way, I was with a married man though I did not know, I felt so guilty when I found out. There was a wife at home taking care of their child while he was running off with me. To her, I’m sorry. You deserve so much more than such an ass.